14 and i feel unwanted

Published Letter #2826 - Posted in , , , , .

Question:

i feel alone like no one cares about me i try talking to people but nothing helps ive felt so depressed ive tried to kill myself many times my mother notices but doesnt do anything about it i hate my life wen my mom drinks she takes all her anger out on me i cry myself to sleep every night everytime something goes wrong i get blamed for it im on the edge where i want to just kill myself and forget that everything ever happend ive ran away so many times im so depressed im over weight for my age i get made fun of all the time even by my own family i get called so many things it hurt i just need help will someone please help me……..Marijane

Answer:

Hi Marijane,
You should be proud of yourself for having the courage to reach out and share your story. Being proactive is not always easy and proves that you are strong. It is understandable that reaching out for help and not getting it, even from your mom, would be depressing. It is not fair for your mom to take all of her anger out on you, getting called names by your family, or being bullied at school.
Thinking about suicide is a serious thing. If you are thinking of suicide, please, please consider calling our 24/7 Lifeline at 866-488-7386. Also, please consider reaching out to someone you trust, to share these feelings with, preferably an adult like a teacher, family member (assuming it is safe), neighbor, or school counselor. You want help and you deserve it.
Also, telling an adult about the bullying at school could help the situation. Please consider telling someone since what is happening is not OK.

If you’re looking to talk to other young people about coming to terms with your identity or others going through similar issues, you can check out TrevorSpace, our social network for LGBTQ youth and allies. It can be a great way to make friends and find support from all around the world. The address for TrevorSpace ishttp://www.trevorspace.org . TrevorSpace also has a discussion forum called Q&Q (Queer and Questioning) where you can post questions and discuss what you’re going through with thousands of other LGBTQ young people on http://www.trevorspace.org/topics.cfm?src=1 .

Please consider going to an emergency room if you are thinking of suicide or at least giving our 24/7 Lifeline a call. You have clearly been through a lot and deserve additional support. Although it may feel like it sometimes, you are not alone. Things sound really tough now, but suicide can be a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Please reach out for more support.
Trevor