Coming out..

Question:

I’m a 15 year old girl who is bisexual and I have a problem with coming out to people. I have told 3 of my closest friends and my mum. But I want to tell more people. It feels like I have a great weight on my shoulders and I want to get rid of it. I want all the weight to lift off my shoulders, one day, and the only way I feel that can happen is to tell people; but I don’t know when to and how to do it. Could you please give me some advice on what to do?
Thank you.

Rachel Middleton
England

Letter submitted by:

Rachel Middleton
England

Answer:

Dear Rachel,

Thank you for getting in touch with The Trevor Project. It is wonderful that you know who love, so young. I do not believe that you have a “problem” with coming out to people. It is just natural to feel very adamant towards others when something you feel, within yourself, means so much to you; and you want to share that with others and that is a special, and unique connection you can make with those who you share yourself with. In regards, to when you should tell people, to be honest there is no exact time to come out to anyone. There is also no special or certain way to come out to someone. Usually, these instances happen when the individual(s) feel safe, comfortable, and are not in any danger. Usually then does someone come-out to their parents, friends, relatives, etc.

Honestly, if in your gut you feel like you really need to share this part of you with someone, then maybe you should. But only when you feel like it is the right time. You will know when that time is. If you will not be harmed in any way and as long as you truly do feel comfortable with it.

Take care of yourself!

AskTrevor Author

Trevor Staff