I dont know what to do

Question:

Well I have been questioning my sexualty for a while now, I am bisexual I am for sure about that but, I dont know anymore for like 15 years of my life I have been asking and I feel I am gender confused maybe I feel I need to be a guy with a women.

Currently I am in a serious realtionship with my boyfriend but I am wondering if this a normal thing? I have confronted my mother and she doesnt know either.. I dont know what to do

Letter submitted by:

Answer:

You are so brave for taking the effort to write to us! What you are going through is not easy, but it is normal. There are so many people experiencing the same thing that you’re going through, and I hope I can help you move forward as you explore this exciting and important part of who you are!

First, you should know that both bisexuality and transsexuality are perfectly natural. As I mentioned, there are so many people who have gone through exactly what you are experiencing now, and it’s very normal to have such confusion and such questions. I encourage you to ask yourself some questions about your sexuality. Remember that sexuality is comprised of a person’s physical, emotional, and romantic attraction to another person. Do you feel these three types of attraction towards both men and women, just women, or just men? When exploring these feelings, think about who you’ve had crushes on in the past and how you feel about certain people now. For instance, is your relationship with your boyfriend physical, emotional, and romantic? Maybe it’s just one of the three types of attraction, or only two of the types of attraction? If you think you may be bisexual, I encourage you to read PFLAG’s Bisexuality 101, located online here: http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/BisexualityResourcePacket.pdf. For more information on transsexuality, I can suggest an excellent pamphlet, found online here: http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/storage/advfy/documents/transgender.pdf. Also check out GLAAD’s transgender resources, located here: http://www.glaad.org/transgender.

If you’re close enough with your boyfriend to discuss these feelings with him, I encourage you to do so. Maybe he can help you in this journey. If not him, then it may be worth talking to someone else. It sounds like you’ve had conversations with your mother about these issues and I think that she would be a great person to talk to. If not her, than a close friend, guidance counselor, or teacher may be a good person in whom you can confide.

Don’t ever hesitate to continue to contact us here at The Trevor Project. You can visit TrevorSpace, The Trevor Project’s social network designed for LGBTQ youth ages 13-24, or chat with someone online through TrevorChat, located at http://www.thetrevorproject.org/chat. You can also call us through our lifeline, which you can reach by calling 1-866-488-7386.

I’m so excited about what’s ahead for you. Just remember to keep being true to yourself!
Yours,

The Trevor Project

Trevor Staff