so, last year I started to fall for my best friend. we had ben friends for a while, and I told her about me being gay, and we had talked about how if I was a boy, she would date me, and we started to explore this idea more. we had always slept in the same bed when she stayed the night, and spooned but thought nothing of it. one night she kissed my forehead and said good night before she rolled over, and had me wrap my arms around her. soon I was in love. I couldn’t go without talking to her, she was my everything. She meant the world to me. One week I went and stayed at her house 100miles away, and we connected in a big way. we had sex. but after I came back home, all of a sudden she said that she didn’t love me any more, and that she wasn’t gay. I was crushed, cried and cried for days. I felt used, and betrayed. To this day we talk, but its not the same. I love her and she still doesn’t love me, she often talks to me about her crushes, and it destroys me on the inside. after that I kind of went dormant, and depressed. I thought I was never going to find love again. recently I’ve became really good friends with a beautiful, amazing, talented, breath taking, basketball star, funny, contagious smile girl. she know I’m gay, but what she doesn’t know is that I like her a lot. She is straight is the problem. She has clearly stated that she doesn’t like girls, and would never bat for the other side… I don’t know what to do. I can only seem to fall for straight girls, what do I do? falling for straight girls is never going to work. I’ve tried to find lesbian girls in my area, but that didn’t work either, I’ve used the Trevor sites, and there’s nobody within 50 miles of my area. I know I’m 16, but I’m not allowed to drive, so having a long distant relationship wont work. Will you please help me?
Letter submitted by:
It sounds like you and this girl are very close friends. Falling in love with friends is normal .We can’t always choose with whom we fall in love. Sometimes we fall in love with close friends. It happens despite our best efforts.When two people create a bond is difficult to not fall in love with that person. They know how to make you laugh , they already know a lot about you and you know that you get along well .
If she is a good friend, then she will respond to you in a way that won’t hurt you. Although her response may not be what you want to hear, hopefully there will be a strong enough bond to continue your friendship.If you’re looking to talk to other young people others going through similar issues, you can check out TrevorSpace, our social network forLGBTQ youth and allies. It can be a great way to make friends and find support from all around the world. The address for TrevorSpace is http://www.trevorspace.org . TrevorSpace also has a discussion forum where you can post questions anddiscuss what you’re going through with thousands of other LGBTQ young people on http://www.trevorspace.org/topics.cfm?src=1 .