I feel like running away from home sometimes when my dad pressures me with girls. I’m gay, but even though I’ve told my mom before when I’m mad, she doesn’t seem to accept it. I don’t know what to do? My friends tell me to do what I think is right.
Signed,
Baldemar, 16, Salinas CA
Dear Baldemar,

This sounds like the kind of problem that our helpline would be in the best position to help you with. If I was talking with you on the helpline, I’d have a lot of questions I’d want to ask to better understand your situation: What, exactly, have you told your parents about your sexual orientation? How does your father “pressure” you about girls? When you say your mom “doesn’t accept” that you’re gay, what does that mean, in terms of how she treats you?

Also, have you tried to set limits with your folks about this (like, saying, for example, “I know you care about me and my welfare, but the pressure you’re putting on me about dating is upsetting me, and I would really appreciate your letting me make my own decisions about this stuff.”).

I’d also want to know if you had spoken with a teacher, school counselor or an extended family member (an aunt?) about what you’re going through. I’m glad you have your friends to talk with about this, and, generally speaking, I would agree with them that you should do what you feel is right—except I’d be concerned if you felt the “right” thing was to run away. Believe me, it’s a very hard life on your own at 16, so, even if your home life is making you nuts, I’d strongly encourage you to explore all your other options before hitting the road. So, Baldemar, my man, call our helpline now! J

Trevor