I have had bad (maybe) experiences with other girls when I was younger, and now I am questioning if i am straight, or just thinking to make myself feel better. Could you help?

 
Signed,
egirl, 13, Portland OR

Dear Egirl,

 

It is perfectly normal and a part of life to question your sexuality and there is no right or wrong answer. In trying to figure out your sexuality, this can be a frustrating and confusing, yet rewarding experience. Sometimes, children and young adults experiment with people of the same sex. It does not necessarily mean you are gay.

 

In trying to understand your sexuality, it might help to remember that sexual orientation involves emotional, romantic as well as physical feelings and attraction for people of both genders (bisexual), people of the same gender (lesbian and gay), and people of the opposite gender (heterosexual or straight). It can also help to think about whom you have crushes on and whom you fantasize about being with girls, boys or both. There is also no rush for you to figure this out, so take a deep breath. Allow yourself the time to understand your feelings before you place a label on yourself. Many people believe sexuality can change to some degree over a person's lifetime. Other people know right away. Being honest and open to your feelings will guide you to better understanding.

 

If you are struggling with this I encourage you to speak with a trusted adult like a teacher, counselor or family member. Remember that you can talk to someone 24x7 at Trevor Lifeline 866-4-U-TREVOR (1-800-488 7386) We are always here for you, day or night. You can also log in to TrevorChat, or visit TrevorSpace at any time.