You are not alone in struggling with feelings of being gay and in having concerns about accepting yourself. It’s unfortunate that accepting oneself as gay is often a difficult task because of the destructive messages that we receive about homosexuality from people and institutions that may be ignorant, narrow-minded or bigoted. When you are confronted with this negative view of homosexuality, you may make you unaware of—or miss—the positive aspects of lesbian, gay bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community. Some examples of these include LGBT people who are in long-term, loving relationships, a sense of community with other LGBT folks, as well as gay men and women in the public eye (Ellen DeGeneres, the musician, Rufus Wainright, Congressman Barney Frank and MANY more) who are open and proud of their sexual orientation.

Because of these conflicting views, it can take time and work to become more comfortable and accepting of yourself. Some people find it helpful to speak with other gay people about issues of sexual orientation and acceptance. I would suggest that you call The Trevor Helpline at 866.4.U.TREVOR (866.488.7386) where you will be able to speak with someone who is aware of and sensitive to the struggles you are dealing with. If you feel comfortable, they can refer you to gay resources in your area. Please don’t feel that you need to process this alone.

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