I am having trouble figuring out if I am gay or transgendered, because I am a boy, but on somedays, I like just wearing boy clothes and makeup, woman's clothes and boys clothes and makeup,and sometimes I just wanted to wear full on woman's clothes it all depends on my mood and I can't figure out my sexuality or gender please help?
Signed,
Jose, 15, San diego CA

Hi Jose, it's perfectly normal to explore yourself. You should keep in mind that being gay means you have a sexual attraction to other men, and being transgendered means that you are strongly certain that you want to be a girl and may perhaps look into procedures to begin that process. But there is no rush to decide who you are, and it is perfectly natural to question your sexuality and gender. There are also people out there who consider themselves crossdressers, and that is separate from sexuality and gender issues.

 

Clothes are simply an expression of who you are. We are all born naked, what we put on to go outside is simple that expression of yourself.  This has not as much to do with your sexual preferences or your perception of your gender. You can be straight and a male and still wish to wear girl's clothes, the three things are unrelated. You can continue to explore your sexuality and gender and - at your own pace - you can decide where to go from there.

 

For further information, you can join our free and safe social networking site for LGBT and allied ages 13-24 at TrevorSpace, and you can also read more at by clicking here about being gay at http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=726&ltemid=336 and by clicking here about being transgendered at http://www.transyouth.com/I%20think%20I%20may%20transgendered.pdf