Alright, the problem is that I had never questioned my sexuality before in my life, until one day, last year, when someone pointed out that I might be gay. I got very defensive, in that I fought the kid. Now till this day I question whether or not I am gay. But now I notice I have an attraction for both sexes. But I can’t tell which one is greater...can u help me out???
Well, as we’ve said here before, no one else (a friend, a therapist, “Dear Trevor”—or even the person you’re having a romantic relationship with!) can tell you what your sexual orientation is.
How you end up labeling yourself in terms of sexual orientation is not as important as how you feel about your attractions, Keak. Given that you fought the kid who suggested you might be gay, I’m guessing you aren’t feeling real comfortable with that notion at this time. J And that’s perfectly understandable: given the culture we all live in, most folks who eventually identify as gay don’t respond to the notion at first with a big “Whoopee!” But, on the other hand, most do eventually become comfortable with it—even happy about it!
I’d really encourage you to try and relax about it, if you can. I realize this may sound lame, but think of it like you’re wanting to paint your bedroom, and you can’t decide whether to paint it blue or green. Why not paint one wall blue and another wall green—and then live with them both for awhile? You’ll eventually either decide that one is best for you—or you’ll decide you’re comfortable with a two-tone bedroom! J
Do a little exploration, if you feel comfortable and safe, and see how it goes. Remember, Keak, that there’s no deadline to figuring this out. Be good to yourself and take your time.