Dear Trevor,

I’m 19 and a parent of a one year old little girl. I strive to do my best for her. I love her with all my heart. Her father has never been in the picture because he used to beat me when I was pregnant. I’ve been working for tow days now, and the same problem that occurred last time I had a job (which was 2months ago) is happening now. No babysitter. NOBODY wants to watch her. Whenever I ask my family, they refuse because I was a teen mom. but even people that have kids as 25 need help right? I NEVER ask for money or a babysitter or any help at all.  The only time is when I have a job and I need to work. Other then that, I am with my child 24.7 and I love it. But I need to support us. I live with my mother who does nothing but judge me and break me down.  I have been called “ a dick sucking bitch”. and all types of other cruel and untrue things by her and my grandmother. I can’t take it.  I need to get my own place. but I have to work, but to work I need a babysitter or a daycare, but I need money for a daycare, which leads back to I need to work. Help me. I feel so down and I want to give up.  I tried killing myself when I was about 4 months pregnant. And I’m feeling it again. I cant bare to leave this world without my child, but I cant bare this life anymore
Signed,
laxer, 19, baltimore MD

 

Dear Laxer,

            Thank you for writing to us!  You and your beautiful little girl’s well-being is so important to us and it takes a whole lot of courage to reach out for some help.  You are absolutely right.  Everyone needs help raising kids.  It’s a tough job.  It’s even tougher for a teen mom such as yourself.  I bet you are really doing the best you can for your little girl.  Hang in there!

 

That sounds really horrible hearing what you had to deal with during your pregnancy and I hope you understand that you and your daughter don’t deserve to be treated that way and no one has a right, ever, to abuse you.   It sounds like you have had a tough time keeping a job because you don’t have anybody to watch over your daughter while you work.  I can only imagine that you are feeling frustrated and helpless.     

 

Have you asked all of your family members for help?  Maybe they don’t all feel the way you think they do about your situation. Whether you are a teen mom or not shouldn’t matter much now that there’s this other life to take care of.  People will judge, but it doesn’t make it any easier when it is your family.  Maybe you can sit down and talk with them and try to get them to understand your situation.  You are trying to do what is best for you and your daughter and you need some family support.  

 

Here are a few websites to help get you started.  Unfortunately, we can’t send you a babysitter, but it will help to find someone to talk to (counselor, social worker, friend).  Just try to find anyone that is there to listen or even babysit once in a while.  Maybe there is someone at your job who can help you out. 

 

The National Crittenton Foundation provides tutoring, counseling and other critical support systems for young moms. Phone: 1-866-449-2217 http://www.nationalcrittenton.org/

 

http://teenshealth.org/teen/

 

The Health Teen Network advocates for public and health policy in support of young families, and also provides a wealth of online resources including information about health care coverage and nutrition during pregnancy. (http://www.healthyteennetwork.org/)

 

Toll-Free Hotlines:

Description: http://a.abcnews.com/images/site/img_bullet_orangedot.gifPlanned Parenthood: 1-800-230-PLAN

Description: http://a.abcnews.com/images/site/img_bullet_orangedot.gifAmerican Social Health Association: 1-800-227-8922

Description: http://a.abcnews.com/images/site/img_bullet_orangedot.gifTeen Dating Abuse Helpline: 866-331-9474

Description: http://a.abcnews.com/images/site/img_bullet_orangedot.gifThe National Runaway Switchboard: 1-800-621-4000

Description: http://a.abcnews.com/images/site/img_bullet_orangedot.gifCovenant House: 1-800-999-9999

 

Since you have had a past history of suicide, I am terribly concerned for you and your daughters safety and really hope that you will see alternatives to this situation.  Your daughter does need you so lets find another way.  I assure you, there are other ways of handling this even though you seem cornered and boxed in.   Always remember that if you are in immediate danger with thoughts of killing yourself, please call us at 18004UTrevor.  It is totally confidential and available for you 24/7.  WE ARE ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU!

 

Love,

The Trevor Project