I'm confuse... I'm a girl and I do love man. But I'm curious, too curious to know about gay.. and I think I love it. till the point, I wanna try it. you know wht I mean..hurmm so wht am I?? I don't want my bf to know about this.. wht would he think... what should I do?? I can't hide it forever...I felt guilty, but I can't stop doing it... the 3rd person is always forcing, and treatened me... I can't bare this anymore...
Signed,
Nil, 19, LA CA

 

Dear Nil,

Thanks for writing into the trevor project and having the courage to seek out information on this issue. It's quite common and natural to question one's sexual orientation throughtout your life, but espcially as you're growing up and trying to figure out who you are. There is nothing wrong with you or your feelings. Generally people identify as either LGBT, which stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered.

 

In trying to understand your sexuality, it might help to remember that sexual orientation involves emotional, romantic as well as physical feelings and attraction for people of both genders (bisexual), people of the same gender (lesbian and gay), and people of the opposite gender (heterosexual or straight). It can also help to think about who you have crushes on and who you fantasize about being with girls, boys or both.

On http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=730&Itemid=177  you'll find the brochure "I Think I Might Be Lesbian...Now What Do I Do?" which may help you with your questions about your sexuality. On http://www.advocatesforyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=726&Itemid=336 you'll find the brochure "I Think I Might Be Gay...Now What Do I Do?"  On www.bisexual.org you'll find a lot of helpful information on bisexuality. If you click on resources, then bisexuality-general information, then "Bisexuality 101 from PFLAG" you can find information that may help. On http://www.transyouth.com/I%20think%20I%20may%20transgender.pdf, you’ll find the brochure, “I Think I Might Be Transgender…Now What Do I Do?” PFLAG’s (Parents, Families & Friends Of Lesbians & Gays) “Be Yourself: Questions for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Youth” at http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/Be_Yourself_TT.pdf can be of further help as you try to understand your sexual orientation/gender identity. Remember that there's no rush to figure this out.

 

You mentioned that someone is forcing you to do things or threatening you. I really really encourage you to talk about your concerns with someone you trust-friend, parent, relative, teacher or school counselor if the situation becomes more extreme. No one has the right to bully you or force you to do thinsg that you are not comfortbale doing.

 

I also suggest Trevorspace for support and help with your questions- Trevorspace at www.trevorspace.org  the Trevor Project's safe, online social networking site for LGBTQ young people ages 13 to 24 their friends and allies. It's a great supportive community where you can connect with others who might have had or are having the same questions that you’re having about your sexuality/gender identity.

 

I hope this helps and feel free to contact us again if you have more questions or concerns.